Things that piss me off…

I mean what is the fucking point of putting all these little scrappy bits of paper through my door? Especially the same one every fucking week… I’ve lived in my house 6 years now (a fact that is quite obvious if you peer through the kitchen window which all the little scrotes delivering them do all the time) so it’s a fair bet that if your takeaway is good I will use it (and get a menu when i’m there if it’s a new one, and If I don’t visit your takeaway it is either overpriced or the food is CRAP. Or Both.

Bands and Clubs on MySpace who:
Have a shoddy MySpace page, blathering on about their website which when you visit it says “Under Construction, please visit
So fucking what. Having a webiste is only cool if you FUCKING USE IT!

People who vomit in urinals:
If you can’t take your drink/drugs DON’T FUCKING TAKE THEM. Ok. so we’ve all got a bit poorly and puked when we’ve overdone it. At least get to a fucking cubicle, or even do it in the sink and WASH IT DOWN.

And while we’re on that kind of subject…
Pubescent lads (usually, though some still seem stuck in puberty a lot longer than is natural) who tap you on the shoukder all nice and appologetic when you’re dancing, and when you move to let them past they plonk their spotty gurning pitiful excuse for existance RIGHT WHERE YOU WERE FUCKING dancing and perv over your mates. DIE!

Work angst here…
Little darling is at University. This means that little darling is an adult and therefore is responsible for his/her own life. Strange though you may find this, You have not signed little darling’s housing contract. You have not fucked up little darling’s essay and so telling the tutor how great he/she is will do jack shit. All this aside from the data protection act. If little darling is as incapable of anything as you seem to think it is blatantly because you have been WIPING LITTLE DARLING’S ARSE FOR THE PAST 18 YEARS.

Receptionists who are too busy:
Filing their nails/texting on their fucking mobiles/reading heat magazine etc. to notice that you are standing there waiting to be seen. If you are too stupid to skive work without your clients/customers noticing you are too fucking stupid even to be a receptionist.

Expletives Deleted:
OK I know this is really minor in the grand scheme of things, and hey it’s not cool to swear kids, but isn’t it really annoying when there’s something on the telly and every other second it’s “beep”… “beep”…
If it’s too early to have swear words don’t show it. If not, don’t bother. That thing about Boy George tonight that I was listening too whilst washing up. Anyone old enough to know who Boy George is, let a lone give two hoots about him is old enough not to be offended. And if it’s libellous. Well the victim can sue him can’t they…


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